We were batting around things to write about this afternoon and came to the conclusion that it is another slow as shit summer day. Since we can only milk Booth’s misfortune and proclivity for self deprecation so long on this site, we thought we’d get back to basics and pass judgement on something.

You know it’s a brutal Sunday night for entertainment when you find yourself torn between watching the Espys and going to see the new “Harry Potter” flick in the theater. That was our night last night. Of course, we went with option #3, drank like twenty beers, and then ordered “Harry Twotter” on pay-per-view, but you get the idea. People can get desperate for entertainment during the summer and most aren’t as resourceful as we are.

The whole thing got us thinking about when it’s actually OK to physically go to the theater to see a movie. There’s a thin loser line and we don’t want you to cross it. Here’s a nice breakdown of what you can and can’t do this summer:

Movies You Can Go See Solo On A Friday or Saturday Night:

None, you douchebag. Friday and Saturday nights are for trying to get laid and then eating a lot of late night McDonald’s when you don’t succeed.

Movies You Can Go See Solo Sunday thru Thursday:

• “Transformers” - Everyone who grew up in the eighties gets a dork pass on this one.
• “Live Free Or Die Hard” - You are always free to watch John McLane.
• “The Simpsons Movie” - Because your girlfriend may ruin the experience for you.
• “The Bourne Ultimatum” - These movies are just fucking cool. That’s it.

Movies You Can Go See With A Date:

• “I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry” - This could have made the above list if Sandler hadn’t churned out so much crap lately. We think Kevin James brings a lot of potential here. He carried “Hitch”.
• “Harry Potter” - Really tough call on what’s acceptable here. These movies are actually pretty good, but it is just tough to justify walking up to the ticket window and asking for a seat to “Harry Potter”. Who’s kidding who? It’s gay. Take a date, preferably a hot one.
• “Rush Hour 3″ - Black guys and Asian guys making fun of each other is always a good time in our book.

Movies You Can Only Go See In The Theater After Your Gender Reassignment Operation:

• “Hairspray” - We refuse to provide commentary here.
• “License to Wed” - Robin Williams in the credits officially is a stamp that a movie is miserable. We’re not sure how Jim from “The Office” got drugged into doing this one.
• “No Reservations” - We saw a preview to this thing over the weekend and we can safely say there is a 70% chance we would take our own lives while watching this. If some girl asks you to take her to see this tell her you get raging erections when you see Catherine Zeta Jones on screen and you don’t want to embarrass yourself. That will silence her.

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