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What Is Irrefutably Lame?


November 8th, 2007 by NextRound

The segment where NextRound passes judgment on uncool topics to determine what you can get away with and what is irrefutably lame.

Is Being a Hockey Fan Irrefutably Lame?

Apparently the NHL season started in September. Who knew? We were under the impression the strike was still going on. Talk about a sport that has lost any and all relevance.

Think about these facts:

1) The NHL is now aired on Versus, a basic cable channel that is headlined by Dennis Miller and boasts Tour de France coverage.

2) It’s easier to get MMA results than NHL highlights on ESPN.

3) There’s only a 3-day weekend between when the NHL playoffs end and the next season begins. And,

4) The average American sports fan can’t name 50% of the teams when given the city, let alone one Eastern Europeaner that plays for them.

So the real question is, what do we make of those few lonely soles that support hockey? The guys who still follow box scores, continue to rock “Hull” jerseys, and say a silent prayer every night that their sport will one day rise from the ashes?

The only virtues that hockey has left are A) it looks pretty good the seldom times it’s broadcast in HD, B) fighting and poor dentistry remain prevalent, and C) NHL players still rake in some primo tail (evidenced here).

But unless over some point in the next three months the season is shortened, every game is broadcast in HD, brawls increase ten-fold, all other professional sports go on strike, and NHL players start allowing season ticket holders to bang their girlfriends…

Unless your Canadian, Eastern European, Russian, reside in upstate New York, Minnesota, or any other US region where the term “hoser” is used with regularity, being a hockey fan is irrefutably lame.

 

Is Watching “Beauty and the Geek” Irrefutably Lame?

 

beauty and the geekWe’ve had a tenuous, ongoing debate regarding “Beauty and the Geek” and it’s irrefutable lameness since the show’s inception.

 

On one hand, it’s difficult to argue for a show that’s on the CW, has “Beauty” in the title, and is in any way associated with the unfiltered douchebaggery that is Ashton Kutcher.

 

But on the other hand, the show is premised on the interaction of mildly retarded hot chicks and 30-year old virgins.

 

The ladies spend a lot of time in swimwear and one dude is a professional LARPER (that’s right, Live Action Role Player). The chicks find fractions confusing and the guys couldn’t close an evening with the opposite sex if they had a pharmacy at their disposal. What’s not to like, right?

 

So, despite the inherent gayness of the show and it’s premise, we can safely say that…

 

Watching “Beauty and the Geek” is not irrefutably lame.

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2 Responses to “What Is Irrefutably Lame?”

  1. Pretender Says:

    Chuck Norris could save the NHL

  2. Pretender Says:

    but he couldnt make ashton kutcher cool or tough

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