If you have any idea who Kaley Cuoco is hopefully it’s because she looks familiar from a promo you saw for some show you immediately decided you would not watch. Or because you stumbled across her on the world wide web and pretended to be her boyfriend for roughly eleven minutes. We sincerely hope it’s not because you’ve seen anything she’s been in. If you have, you should probably keep it to yourself.

Kaley is currently occupying the role of “hot chick” in the “hot chick interacts with dorky guys” formula being employed on CBS’s “The Big Bang Theory”. We’ve actually had some people tell us that “The Big Bang Theory” is funny, but–as we’ve cited before–any show that boasts “From the creators of ‘Two and a Half Men’!” is systematically boycotted by us. Besides, the people doing the recommending are fucking boring anyway, which pretty much proves our point.

Anyhoo, Kaley is nice to look at and relatively successful for her age, so hopefully her future endeavors (like this spoof movie) won’t be as terrible as they look so we can finally see her in something.

Kaley Cuoco’s Hump Day Bio

Age: 23. aka The Jordan Era. We spent ours trying to convince chicks our parents couldn’t hear anything from the basement.

Where You May Have Seen Kaley:

• Played the Marsha role in made-for-TV movie “Growing Up Brady”. Aaaaaannnd cue threesome fantasy with Kaley and a 19 year-old Maureen McCormick.

• “8 Simple Rules”. The sitcom John Ritter was starring in when he died. Bummer.

• The eighth season of “Charmed”, frequently recognized as the finest season.

• “The Big Bang Theory”

• And some movie called “Cougar Club”, if you’re one of those dudes who rents straight-to-DVD T&A flicks as opposed to downloading porn. On second thought, “Cougar Club” sounds like it has some potential.

Kaley’s Super Power: Two-faceness. Paradoxical ability to look like she’s asking to get pummeled in most instances (i.e. next picture) and then look completely washed up and cross-eyed in others (as evidenced here). Eerie.

The Most Bonerific She’s Ever Looked:

Dudes She’s Been Linked To: An impressive assortment of no-name, pretty boy douchebags.

Fun Facts on Kaley Cuoco:

• Was home-schooled. Virtual guarantee that she’d slash your tires and sleep with your best friend if you broke up with her.

• Was a nationally ranked tennis player before she got into acting. Very similar to how we were nationally ranked X-Box players before we got into the web site biz.

• Not even her closest friends have any fucking clue how to pronounce her last name.

• Gets REALLY slutty after five peach margaritas.

• Co-starred in some miserable movie with Nick Carter. She’s quoted as saying, “Nick’s not as gay as you’d expect him to be.”

Our Favorite YouTube Clip: This one from that “8 Rules” show where Kaley’s dressed as a slutty school girl. This after John Ritter passed (hence the David Spade sighting) so we’re pretty sure she was legal when this was shot. Enjoy.

Our Handpicked Gallery:

Happy Hump Day!

[Sources: Wikipedia, IMDb, Who’sDatedWho]

Previous Editions of Hump Day:

• Rachel Bilson
• Bar Refaeli
• Ashley Scott
• Eliza Dushku
• Heidi Montag

“Hump Day” is NextRound’s weekly segment featuring pretty ladies you should get to know. Click here to check out previous editions.

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