The semi-relevant information you need to know this week in your ongoing pursuit to maintain awesomeness…

“Run Fatboy Run” opens Friday. It stars Simon Pegg of “Shaun of the Dead” and “Hot Fuzz” fame, and is about an out of shape dude who trains to run a marathon in order to impress some chick. David Schwimmer directs, which is kind of weird, but until Pegg disappoints we’re on board, especially after reading these awesome quotes from Pegg this morning.

Stephen Curry could have walked on to Virginia Tech. Stephen’s dad, Dell Curry, played for Virginia Tech so the the Hokies were Stephen’s first college choice, but like just about every other major conference school Virginia Tech did not offer Stephen a scholarship citing lack of size and an overall resemblance to A-Rod’s little sister. And now Stephen plays for Davidson, where his mission is to systematically teach every doubter a big fucking lesson. (Davidson/Wisconsin opens a killer slate of games starting 7PM Friday.)

No new “Lost” episodes until April 24th. So when you overhear that one clueless dipshit in your office mention how stoked he is to catch “Lost” on Thursday, be the first to ask him what he thought Friday morning.

Tennessee/Louisville tips at 9:57PM on Thursday. Get ready to start your bitching! Arguably one of the best Sweet Sixteen matchups won’t end till well after midnight on the east coast, which is quite a predicament for anyone with a job they take seriously (we’ll be watching).

SouthParkStudios.com just launched. Every episode from all 12 seasons is available at full length. So now when you’re confused by some clever South Park reference a friend makes (i.e. the Giant Douche v. Turd Sandwich election reference), all you have to do is go here to educate yourself.

Britney’s on “How I Met Your Mother” tonight. Any other show and we’d go out of our way not to mention it, but seeing that “How I Met Your Mother” is one of the few network comedies worth watching, we find this move kind of interesting. It may be Britney’s final shot at redemption (that doesn’t involve getting super hot again). Too bad people are already bitching about the CBS promos.

Suns at Celtics 7PM Wednesday. How old is Shaq? How determined is KG? How Canadian is Steve Nash? Can the Celtics hold court in Texas AND Arizona? Find out Wednesday on ESPN!

The Saints really might trade for Jeremy Shockey. It’s only fitting that the new America’s Team would go after the one dude in the NFL with the most patriotic arm art. You can’t tell us that this won’t end in a new Kim Kardashian sex tape.

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