Today’s edition of what’s not lame around the world wide web:

There’s just no getting around our infatuation with Cheryl Tweedy. And apparently she’s an REM fan, make of that what you will. [Hollywoodtuna]

And here it is…the NFL schedule! Nothing says pro football like Bills/Dolphins in Canada in December. [Deadspin]

According to scouts the Knicks haven’t run a single play in months. This is the sort of awesomeness we’re truly going to miss when Isiah is canned any day now. Tom Brokaw must have just gotten wind of this. [Fan IQ]

We too deplore the guy who cuts his fingernails at work. We’re kind of bullshit Tasty Booze beat us to it. [Tasty Booze]

Ten Films Not Good Enough for DVD. Highly entertaining. That fans can’t watch “Howard the Duck” on Blu-Ray is a travesty. [College Humor]

Now this is more like it. Pete Wentz apparently claims he didn’t knock up Ashlee Simpson. We knew you couldn’t impregnate someone via heavy petting. [Page Six]

Emma Watson (aka the chick from “Harry Potter”) hits 18 today. Steve Irony has been counting this one down for what seems like a decade. [On 205th]

Things That Are More Likely Than the Hawks Upsetting the Celtics. We enjoyed this almost as we enjoy our own lists. [Epic Carnival]

Did you know Andy Garcia was a Siamese twin? Weird, right? And while we’re at it, why did “Godfather III” suck so bad? So many questions. [Film Drunk]

Katherine Heigl loves the sticks more than your aunt who works at the convenience store. [Popoholic]

Patriots center Dan Koppen got hitched to a cheerleader named Amber over the weekend. And not only is this chick the daughter of an ex-NFL player, but she was also the inspiration for a Blues Traveler song. We’ve got zero jokes, that shit’s just interesting. [SportsbyBrooks]

The Eleven Manliest Cocktails in the World. Strangely enough, we did not see Gin Fizz on the list. [Holy Taco]

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