Too many brilliant people from the 80’s have been forgotten. We’re here to commemorate some of the rare genius that comprised the next to last decade of the 20th century.

Today we honor 80’s movie icon: Ralph Macchio.

How You Remember Him: As crane-kicking Daniel LaRusso. As Ponyboy’s dead buddy. As the guy Johnny failed to put into a bodybag.

How You Should Also Remember Him: As the dude who de-flowered Elisabeth Shue. As the whiny bitch in “Karate Kid III”. As Mr. Miyagi’s day laborer. As the dude who was actually Vinny’s cousin in “My Cousin Vinny”. As the lameass who honks noses instead of rightfully killing people when he’s vacationing in Japan.

Reasons Why You Probably Thought Ralph Was Dead: 1) You figured he killed himself when he realized a cameo on “Entourage” meant he hit rock bottom. 2) You cut “My Cousin Vinny” off half way through because you couldn’t handle the accents. You just assumed Ralph got the chair. 3) It seemed fitting that he died on the same day as Mr. Miyagi.

Coolest Thing No One Knows About: He was man enough to get hair plugs. And not the cheap infomercial ones either, Ralph ponied up. Behold the Before & After:

BAM!

Sort of Work He’s Been Relegated to in the 21st Century: Self-mocking cameos. Bit parts in shitty movies helmed by Artie Lang. Being a dad (Sucksville!). And endorsing Barak Obama. With Macchio’s backing we have no fucking clue how the powers that be haven’t just foregone the election and handed over the White House to Obama.

Best Way to Remember Ralph’s Cool & Toughness: Reminiscing about the time he whipped it out in front of Shue in the photobooth. She so wanted him to do it.

[Sources: Wikipedia, IMDb]

“Commemorating the 80’s” is NextRound’s memorial to the greatest decade ever.

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