The NFL Draft came and went faster than a weekend bender (but that may have had something to do with my weekend bender). I spent this past Sunday watching every single pick of the second day of the NFL draft, all 8 hours of coverage (awesome, I know). I watched two players from I-AA Richmond get their names called and lots of college football household names fall into the late rounds. The latter are destined to never be heard from again.

I’ve spent the last four years with these guys, watching them play, wagering on them, inevitably violently cursing them, so the whole experience was weirdly nostalgic seeing that now they’re irrelevant.

And don’t give me the Tom Brady / Terrell Davis argument. The Tom Brady phenomenon requires a player not to get any playing time in college because they are sitting behind another great college football player. The Terrell Davis phenomenon requires a major injury in college that sidelines the player for most of their collegiate career. In either case, pro scouts know these guys have talent, but they don’t know exactly what they are getting so the players fall in the draft.

The guys I’m talking about have all played A TON of college football; the pro scouts know what they’re getting when drafting these players and they’re looking for them to to fill out the roster, help out during training camp, and eventually quietly disappear without even a mention on ESPN’s Bottomline.

So without further ado, one final look back…

Dennis Dixon, QB - Oregon

5th round pick # 156 (soon to be cut by Pittsburgh Steelers)

Steelers Logic: Maybe we can turn him into Antwaan Randle-El.

Reality: Dixon is coming off a serious knee injury. He’s never experimented at receiver in college like Randle-El did. And generally the QB to WR doesn’t work (see: Matt Jones, Eric Crouch, etc.).

Most Memorable Degenerate Moment: When Oregon putting a 39-7 beatdown on Michigan in Week 2 last season. Oregon ran the statute of liberty followed by a fake statute of liberty in the process. Both were pretty sweet. The Ducks were +8 going into the game and a lot of people enjoyed a nice payday rolling on the moneyline.

Erik Ainge, QB - Tennessee

5th round pick # 162 (soon to be cut by the NY Jets)

Jets Logic: Maybe he’ll develop into a solid backup for Kellen Clemens. At the very least he’s got a stronger arm than Pennington.

Reality: Ainge started as a freshmen at Tennessee. They never won anything with him and in the process he led the Vols to a 5-6 campaign that included a season ending loss to Vanderbilt. This guy was below average in college and isn’t going to be any better in the pros.

Most Memorable Degenerate Moment: In 2005, Ainge led the Vols on the road to Notre Dame. The Irish smacked them around to the tune of 41-21 while Ainge threw a couple picks. Notre Dame was -9 going into the game because Vegas refused to believe the Vols were that terrible. The public on the other hand knew that the Tennessee program had fallen from “national elite” to “SEC Power” to “perennial Top 25″ to “a program with a mediocre coach who likes to eat sandwiches on the hot seat”.

Colt Brennan, QB - Hawaii

6th round pick # 186 (soon to be cut by the Washington Redskins)

Skins Logic: He threw 73 TDs in one season in college and is super accurate.

Reality: He’s too short, too small, his arm is too weak, and he holds the football longer than I hold a sausage biscuit (see: Sugar Bowl ‘07).

Most Memorable Degenerate Moment: In the 2006 Hawaii Bowl, Arizona State led Hawaii 10-3 at halftime late on Christmas Eve. While most reasonable people had just laid to rest with visions of sugar plums dancing in their heads, us degenerates were salivating at a second half Over/Under of 38. Hawaii scored 38 points themselves in the second half on the way to a 41-24 victory.

Mike Hart, RB - Michigan

6th round pick # 202 (soon to be cut by Indianapolis Colts)

Colts Logic: Ultra productive college back who would have been a first day pick if he left early.

Reality: He is slow. Really slow. 4.7 40 time = destroyed in the backfield on every play in the NFL.

Most Memorable Degenerate Moment: Pulling the classic “I guarantee victory” against Notre Dame this past season like anyone gave a shit with both teams sitting at 0-2. Michigan was -7 and laid 38-0 ass whooping. Mike Hart went for 187 yards in the process. Mark May called it a heroic performance. Those of us who are knowledgeable about college football realized it was an above average football team beating up a god awful football team.

The one thing all these soon-to-be forgotten players have in common is that they were part of every handicapping conversation involving their respective teams. They dominated barstool exchanges in the fall and now they are gone. But I part ways with them with these two small pieces of advice:

1. Hold onto your NFL roster spot like grim death for as long as possible.
2. Use your NFL gig and whatever brand equity your name still has to get yourself laid, early and often.

People still know who you guys are RIGHT NOW. But soon, very soon, you will spiral into obscurity and chicks won’t believe you’re an NFL player anymore than they believe I AM! (I play tight end for the Falcons.)

Previous Editions of Turf Toe:

• Booth Previews the Western Conference
• Booth Previews the Eastern Conference
• Has the Sports World Underestimated Memphis?
• Booth Defends His Bracket
• Moderately Good Teams That Could Make Your Bracket

“Wicked Case of Turf Toe” is Booth’s weekly column dedicated to passing judgment on the world of sports. Click here for the archives.

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