Today’s edition of what’s not lame around the world wide web:

An AWESOME compilation of pro athlete vanity plates. Mucho respecto to the guys at Food Court Lunch. [Food Court Lunch via With Leather]

A list after our own heart. 12 Ugliest Sitcom Moms. [Holy Taco]

Just when you thought your boy, Spencer Pratt, couldn’t dish out any more life-altering advise, he decides to go anal. [Gawker]

Another aspiring An actual porn star and her MySpace page. [Hottest Girls of MySpace]

The Bears cut Adam Archuleta, another step towards the extinction of the white safety. At least Arch has an OK wife to go home to (NSFW hint: Google “Jennifer Walcott”). [Yahoo Sports]

Top 20 Television Sports Pet Peeves. We didn’t see “FOX attempting to broadcast college football” on here, but have to assume it’s implied. [Epic Carnival]

Hilary Duff is making a serious front court play, and we’re all for it. Bravo, sweetheart, bravo. [On 205th]

Roger Clemens may have also taken the lumber to a 17 year-old Melons waitress (that’s right, a Hooters’ knock-off called “Melons”). Man, everything is just coming up Rocket lately, huh? [SbB]

Apparently Angelina Jolie is having twin daughters. So by our math that makes three girls with flawless physical genes due to be 18 by 2026. What a coincidence, that’s just about the time we plan on being ridiculously handsome and wealthy (we age well). [IDLYITW]

Of course, PETA plans to protest the Preakness. We’re thinking of starting our own charity dedicated to getting the members of PETA laid. [FanHouse]

Email This