After a year of horse ownership, Team Cool & Tough’s very own filly, Palace on a Lake, will run today.

I’m trying to make that sound as definite as possible seeing that the last time she was scheduled to race the trainer scratched her due to morning sickness (or a head cold or something equally lame), and then from there he decided to send her on a six month vacation to Florida so she could “learn how to be a horse again.”

(Editor’s Note: In case you’re new to the site and the trials and tribulations of Palace on a Lake we recommend visiting this portion of our archives and starting at the bottom.)

I still don’t understand how a horse forgets it is a horse. The whole thing is perplexing. Are horses like middle school kids that go through identity crises? Was our Palace going through a rebellious Goth stage? Hard to say.

Regardless, as long as she takes her cold medicine, Palace will be running today, July 1st, 2008, in the 6th race at Delaware Park. Post time for the race is 3PM EST. She will start from the 10 position.

If you want to watch the race go to ESPN.com, then:

• Click on the OTHER link along the top of the site.
• Select HORSE RACING from the drop down list.
• Click on LIVE RACING along the top of the horse racing page.
• Click on DELAWARE on the left side.

The overnight line on Palace is 10/1.

Does that read like “Cha-ching! Cha-ching!” to anyone else?

If you want some serious handicapping advice you’ve come to the wrong place. Every member of Team C&T will be ill-advisedly wagering on Palace in some form or fashion. I plan to bet 2 units on her to Win, 1 unit on her to Place, and 1 unit on her to Show. If she can finish in the top 3 I should break close to even.

The plan is to use this first race to win back a considerable portion of our investment in this phenomenal endeavor. You may find this hard to believe, but some investors have been less than thrilled with their first venture into horse racing. Nothing got the crew more riled up than the day I emailed them asking for additional money to fund Palace’s six month Florida vacation.

Amazingly — after only a mild amount of badgering — the checks started to roll into my mailbox. But not without trepidation, of course. I got some pretty interesting comments on those checks. I’ve broken them down into 4 categories:

Category 1: Pissed at Booth

• For: “Horse Feed”
• For: “Owning 1 Share of Nothing”
• For: “Bad Investing”
• For: “Glue Stick on Legs”
• For: “I Hate You Booth”

Category 2: Try to Make Booth Too Embarrassed to Cash a Check (Which Would Never Happen)

• For: “Rub & Tug”
• For: “Homoerotic Favors”
• For: “Filthy, Filthy Hooker”

Category 3: Trying to Be Funny

• For: “1 Florida Vacation”
• For: “Braids for My Little Pony”

Category 4: Just Plain Bizarre

• For: “My Pet”

The “My Pet” comment in and of itself is really not that bizarre. HOWEVER, the check was folded up in this picture.

I’m still not exactly sure what E.T. has to do with this situation. If you have any theories please feel free to pass them along. I’m going to need something to keep me preoccupied with the percentage of my net worth I have riding on the race this afternoon.

(Update: Check out the results show here.)

Previous Editions of Happily Hungover:

• Booth Gets a Job
• When Acting Cool & Tough Goes Bad
• Booth Wakes Up Early, Shock to System
• Booth Goes on an Interview
• Saturday Running Diary

“Happily Hungover” is Booth’s column chronicling the life and times of NextRound’s Marketing Director/Resident Couch Dweller.

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