Hump Day: Brooklyn Decker

July 2nd, 2008 by NextRound in Hump Day, Lady Friends

Since it’s a short week and no pretty ladies have done anything notable to jump on our radar we’re going to Plan B: Honoring chicks that are really f-ing hot. Swimsuit model hot. Think-about-baseball-all-you-want-there’s-no-preventing-premature-ejaculation hot.

And just in case you’re dying for some relevance we heard Brooklyn’s fiancee is a famous America tennis player with a debilitating fear of the third round in a major. Can’t remember his name at the moment though.

Brooklyn’s Hump Day Bio

Age: 21. You wouldn’t even have to worry about scoring her a fake ID like you did for your last two girlfriends.

Figure: Stunningly natural.

How Many Times Over You’d Off Andy Roddick to Bang Her: 6.

Fantasy Career Ambition: Trophy wife of the world’s greatest tennis player.

Realistic Career Expectation: Trophy wife of America’s fourth or fifth best tennis player.

Fun Facts on Brooklyn:

Ironically — unlike Lebron — Brooklyn is her third favorite borough.

She is no way named after a variation of the practical joke where someone poops in the upper tank of someone else’s toilet.

Even when pressed she won’t admit to seeing a resemblance between Roddick and Frodo Baggins.

She was discovered in a shopping mall in Charlotte, NC yet somehow doesn’t have a favorite NASCAR driver.

When asked if she wants to be the next Marissa Miller she responded, “Why? So Maxim Magazine can realize I’m the hottest chick on the planet three years too late?”

The Time We Went Horseback Riding: