Hump Day: Aubrey O’Day

August 6th, 2008 by NextRound in Hump Day, Lady Friends

We’d love to tell you we have no idea who Aubrey O’Day is and we selected her for H Day after stumbling across her picture and being astonished by the extent to which she is begging to get violated. But the sad truth is — after enduring countless hours of crappy television in desperate attempts to round second base — we’ve learned that she’s a member of Puff Daddy’s make believe pop group Danity Kane.

We do have to say that one of the few advantages of willingly allowing MTV and E! to kill our braincells is getting acquainted with 24 year-old C-list celebrities with fakies and standing Botox appointments. From what we can gather Aubrey felt like her god-given looks didn’t capture her inner ho so she’s taken every measure to morph into a version of herself that looks like it’s constantly on the way to an adult film audition.

And for the record that’s what we like about her.

Aubrey’s Hump Day Bio

Age: 24, yet rocks the lips of a fifty year-old socialite.

Figure: Plasticy, boobilicious.

How Many Times You’d Listen to “Damaged” in Order to Bang Her: 31 times.

Fantasy Career Ambition: The next Christina Aguilera.

Realistic Career Expectation: A poor man’s Fergie.

Fun Facts on Aubrey:

Recently sucked face with another chick in front of the paparazzi. It was a desperate publicity stunt, but luckily for Aubrey the only acceptable desperate publicity stunts are girl on girl publicity stunts.