The best dads keep parenting old school and teach their kids valuable life lessons through experiences. Here are twelve of our all-time favorite “Best Dad Ever” moments, complete with the lessons they taught.

The Bachelor Party Lesson: You can’t get in trouble for watching.

The Sports Lesson: Your opponent has no sympathy for you lack of athletic ability.

The Free Ride Lesson: Never, ever pass up a free ride. Walking is the worst.

The Thin Ice Lesson: There’s only one way to accurately determine just how thin it is.

The Playboy Lesson: Best read shirtless with no girls around.

The Internet Lesson: Someone, somewhere is going to make you look like an asshole every time you post something on the internet.

The Mike Tyson Lesson: Never be the first to show fear. You’ll get eaten alive.

The Don’t Pee in the Pool Lesson: Because it’s the equivalent of pissing directly on every other swimmer’s head.

The Comic Con Lesson: Embrace your true self early on in life. It will sting much less when they all laugh at you.

The Stairs Lesson: Stairs, like life, are unforgiving. Deal with it.

The Electric Fence Lesson: They aren’t nearly as electric as people make them out to be.

The Novelty Store Lesson: Only go in when there are two or less cars in the parking lot.

We hope all the illegitimate dads in our audience took thorough notes.

Updated honorable mention.

Thanks to Banned in Hollywood and Fail Blog for several of the pics.

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