The best dads keep parenting old school and teach their kids valuable life lessons through experiences. Here are twelve of our all-time favorite “Best Dad Ever” moments, complete with the lessons they taught.

The Bachelor Party Lesson: You can’t get in trouble for watching.

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The Sports Lesson: Your opponent has no sympathy for you lack of athletic ability.

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The Free Ride Lesson: Never, ever pass up a free ride. Walking is the worst.

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The Thin Ice Lesson: There’s only one way to accurately determine just how thin it is.

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The Playboy Lesson: Best read shirtless with no girls around.

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The Internet Lesson: Someone, somewhere is going to make you look like an asshole every time you post something on the internet.

The Mike Tyson Lesson: Never be the first to show fear. You’ll get eaten alive.

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The Don’t Pee in the Pool Lesson: Because it’s the equivalent of pissing directly on every other swimmer’s head.

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The Comic Con Lesson: Embrace your true self early on in life. It will sting much less when they all laugh at you.

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The Stairs Lesson: Stairs, like life, are unforgiving. Deal with it.

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The Electric Fence Lesson: They aren’t nearly as electric as people make them out to be.

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The Novelty Store Lesson: Only go in when there are two or less cars in the parking lot.

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We hope all the illegitimate dads in our audience took thorough notes.

Updated honorable mention.

Thanks to Banned in Hollywood and Fail Blog for several of the pics.

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